Book Review: These Two Are Too Awful To Spend Time With

Publication Dates:  June and July 2020

Review, short version:  All skunks, all the time.

Review, long version:

I read two books back-to-back and they were so awful, I decided to kill two birds with one stone, or in this case, trash two books with one review.

The books are The Lies That Bind by Emily Griffin and Things You Save in a Fire by Katherine Center.

Griffin’s lead character is Cecily Gardner, 28, and the setting is New York in 2001.

  1. Cecily’s in a long-term relationship with Matthew, but Matthew isn’t ready to commit, so Cecily dumps him.
  2. A month later Cecily meets Grant, immediately knows he’s The One, and they become lovers.
  3. Grant dies in the 9/11 attack.
  4. Cecily discovers Grant was married, so apparently he wasn’t The One.
  5. Cecily reunites with Matthew, they get engaged.
  6. Cecily discovers she’s pregnant, but neglects to advise fiancé Matthew that he might not be the father.
  7. Cecily discovers Grant is still alive, but hiding from the Feds because of his involvement in an insider trading scheme.
  8. Cecily confesses everything to Matthew and he is understandably upset.
  9. Cecily has the baby.
  10. Grant serves his prison time.
  11. Cecily and Grant reunite and are happily ever after.

This list isn’t the bare bones of the story – it is the story.

Now for Things You Save in a Fire.

Center’s lead character is Cassie Hanwell, 26.  The setting is a mythical town near Boston.

  1. Cassie is tough.
  2. No, seriously, Cassie is really tough.
  3. Tougher than tough.
  4. Cassie’s been hurt, so she shut down her emotions and got tough.
  5. Have I mentioned that Cassie is tough?
  6. Cassie’s mother is dying of brain cancer, but that’s OK, because Cassie is tough.
  7. Cassie is a firefighter, and the other all male firefighters don’t like having a female in the department.
  8. But that’s OK, because Cassie is tough.
  9. Then she’s attracted to one of the male firefighters, Owen.
  10. Owen gets injured on the job.
  11.  Her mother dies, Owen lives, Cassie and Owen are happily ever after.

Yup, that’s it.

Here’s the category I’d give to these two books:

You know how, on Amazon, books are categorized as Biography or Young Adult or Women’s Contemporary Fiction and so on? Here’s my category:

“Millennial Neurotic Lead Character’s Life is All Screwed Up Until She meets Mr. Right and Then All Her Issues are Resolved in the Last 20 Pages.”

Although come to think of it, that really isn’t a new category after all…

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