Or, why you do NOT want to come to my house for Christmas dinner…
| I am no cook But I like to look At food magazines and such. The pictures are neat And I love to eat But to cook – well, not so much. |
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| I won’t win a prize For my apple pies Of baking I’ve nothing to boast. My cakes turn out flat And much worse than that Hell, I struggle just making toast. |
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| I once had a wish To fry up some fish Which into the trash I did dump. The people I feed Oh, where does it lead? To a date with a stomach pump. |
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| I’m giving up hope My cooking’s a joke No matter how hard I strive. I promise I’ll stay From the kitchen – away So my family and friends survive. |
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I Hate Houseguests 