For a number of years, on its last page Time magazine has published a 10 Questions interview with someone they consider, well…Time-worthy.
I usually read this article, and one October day five years ago I reached that last page and began reading.
At first, I didn’t recognize the person being interviewed. But I was barely into the article and already thinking, “Who is this twit?” When I finally realized who I was reading about, I was inspired to write a response.
The person featured in the interview was author Elizabeth Gilbert, who in 2014 was promoting her new book, The Signature of All Things. Ms. Gilbert has a new book due out in June, so it seemed like an appropriate time to revisit my response:
Dear Ms. Gilbert:
|I read your 10 Questions interview in the October 14 issue of Time.|
|I also heard your interview on NPR, so I’m inferring that you’re doing an author’s tour, which I understand has become an event…|
|As rare as a Loch Ness Monster sighting.|
|Of course, your status as an author of – well, status – is without doubt.|
|According to Wikipedia, your book Eat, Pray, Love spent something like seven million weeks on the best seller list…|
|And was made into a movie starring Julia Roberts.
Talk about status!
|And you were included on a Time 100 list the of most influential people in the world –|
|not just the United States, mind you, but the world –|
|along with other movers and shakers like Sarah Palin,|
|and Larry the Cable Guy.|
|With regards to the Time article, I couldn’t help but notice – and can’t help but comment on – the following:|
Your statement: “I was late [to this interview] because my hairdresser wanted to tell me about…”
|Ms. Gilbert, regardless of your status, it is not OK to be late – to an interview, a lunch date…|
|A sighting of the Loch Ness Monster.|
|It’s a tacky power play sending the message that you’re more important than the person you kept waiting.|
|And you kept Time magazine waiting. Who’s next?|
|Your sweater: It looks like you were on your way out the door and thought, “Gosh, I need a sweater.|
|“Oh, look, here’s the pile of stuff I’ve been meaning to give to Goodwill for the past eight months. I’ll just dig down here and…|
|“Oh, that beige thing! Perfect!”|
|Wow, is that an actual A-Line from the late 60s? Judging by its lack of style and shape I’m guessing…Yes!|
|Your knees: Are ugly. We women reach a point when it may be prudent not to reveal certain body parts except in the privacy of our bedroom or gynecologist’s office. Knees are on that list…|
|Along with the stuff that accumulates on the underside of our upper arms and keeps moving even when we’re standing still.|
|You’re 44 and your knees show it. Stop showing them.|
|Your ankle boots: Are you serious? Ankle boots with a dress?|
|If you’re 24: Hot.|
|If you’re 44: Not.|
|Your new book: The Signature of All Things.|
|I haven’t read it and I’m doubtful I’ll tackle a 512-page tome about… moss.|
|And speaking of moss, have you read Kate’s book?|
|Now, she’s got some nice knees!|
Ms. Gilbert, your new book, City of Girls, comes out in June.
|And I can’t wait to see your interviews!|